Trust my luck!

When I began PN last week so many people said 'you'll notice a huge boost in energy straight away' and 'you'll feel so much better' but I just wasn't getting it, in fact I felt worse than when I was home. The past week I've been sleeping 14+ hours a day and still struggling to keep my eyes open, walking and staying mobile has felt like such a challenge as my body feels so heavy and tiring to move. The quality of my sleep probably hasn't helped as I'm currently checked on regularly and the infusion pump is committed to beeping every few hours. Who needs an alarm clock when you have a feed or infusion pump?!

After not understanding why I was so tired it began to make sense when both me and my nurses suspected I had a nasty infection brewing..(common symptoms include back ache and fatigue!) It also explains why my kidneys have been pounding with pain..I had originally blamed the hospital beds but perhaps that was wrong! Usually I'm pretty sharp with recognising symptoms, but with a whirlwind of new things, having my PICC line placed, starting PN and of course not sleeping much I never thought of blaming the devil I do know, a water infection. Needless to say we're investigating things right now and monitoring closely, an infection is a small step back that we can hopefully sort out shortly and move on from- but with me still being so weak its knocked me a lot harder than it would a relatively healthy person. I am feeling a little stronger today but still needing a fair few power naps..which is understandable if my body is still fighting an infection. With some luck I'm hoping to escape the hospital later this week to keep my mind busy and have something to look forward to.

I'm missing the horses and all my animals so much at the moment, I rely on them daily to help keep me company and also cheer me up- so having that taken away makes me feel like there's a part of me missing. Luckily, mum is doing a super job of keeping me updated with pictures and videos alongside making sure Daisy stays fit and happy- ready for my return! As lost as I feel without them, I'm also acutely aware that being here right now is my best chance at getting strong enough to fully enjoy the horses when the time is right and I do get home. That in itself is currently helping to fuel this admission and all my efforts to continue fighting any hiccups that spring up.

I've had some really lovely cards and packages sent by a few special friends since coming in, just to even be in peoples thoughts means so much when everything else is so new and strange. My animals are wonderful, but it's safe to say I'm also lucky enough to have some of the most wonderful friends and family too.

#findawaynotanexcuse